Saturday, March 13, 2010

Tip #141

Guys, if a girl post about being sad in her status and you attempt to comfort here via a "what's wrong?" comment, know that you have no chance with her.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Tip #140

Stop taking pictures with your Pit Bull. All you're doing is proving how insecure you are about yourself.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Tip #139

Ladies, it's one thing to speak like you're mildly retarded, but don't write like you are too.

"Bitch ur a playahhhhhhh!"

Tip #138

Please use the "F" word sparingly. You'll find that when you do, it's a lot more effective.

"im so fucking pissed i could fucking punch someone in the fucking face"

One "fuck" would have done the trick.

Tip #137

St. Patrick's Day is March 17th. Stop celebrating it early. When you do that, you're just a drunk.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Tip #136

If you did the work you were supposed to do last night, you wouldn't be complaining about all the work you have to do on your snow day. No one feels bad for you because we're too busy SLEDDING!

Tip #135

Pickles are good, but if they released an album, no one would buy it. On the other hand, if Nickelback decided to let people eat them, everyone would be a fan.

So think really hard before you join the Group "Let's see if this Pickle can get more Fans than Nickelback"

Tip #134

We get it, Northeast. It's snowing and you're trapped inside. All of your friends know it's snowing, because they also live in the Northeast. Don't post about something that millions of people can see by looking out the window.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Tip #133

Girls, no matter how sexy you are or what pose you're in, you're never sexy with a poncho on. It's the opposite of sexy. If you put a poncho over two models having having sex, they'll look like two hobos wrestling for a sandwich. In closing:

Poncho = Hobo Wrestler

Tip #132

If you have a lot of "sexy" profile pictures, I bet it's really easy to see you get "sexy" in person. Get it? (You're slutty)